Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Help. I’m 16 and just got spanked by both of my parents for taking the car. What do I do? I want to run off somewhere but I’m so scared that I’ll get spanked again. I’ve never gotten the paddle before and I’m still scared to sit

I don’t buy bullshit

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

How has Donald Trump turned the Taylor Swift endorsement into a win for him?

I see through liars

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

How airline fees have turned baggage into billions - BBC

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

'He was a big teddy bear’: Hurricane woman pushes for mental health reform, suicide advocacy - St. George News

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Can anyone show a photo with a penis in their anus?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

NASA Discovers That Venus’ Surface Is Still Alive: New Evidence of Active Geology - The Daily Galaxy

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I actually pay taxes

My ex got into a relationship within 2 weeks after a breakup. What should I do?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Is it sinful for Christians to look at beautiful women?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

See the moon shine with famous red star Antares in the southern sky on June 9 - Space

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Pain relief breakthrough as scientists discover a safer, non-addictive approach - Earth.com

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I can count

I have a reading level above third grade

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I can read

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have complete contempt for fakery

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”